We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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