I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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