I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Rumble strips road head = magical
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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