do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
