do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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