I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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