that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
