I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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