check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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