I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
