i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
