It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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