"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
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