I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Randomize
