so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize