My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
