if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You brought string cheese to the strip club
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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