He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
