Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize