I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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