Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize