yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
