I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Blow job season was short but glorious.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
