If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
