come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize