so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
