well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize