I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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