Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I had to cum in my sink.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
