I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
where are my eyebrows?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
