just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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