Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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