is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize