I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
