Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize