his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
