I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
