school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I have tasted many bathrooms
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
