Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
