she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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