I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She even gives head with a lisp.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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