it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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