Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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