we have pet lesbian snakes
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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