Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
