so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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