There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize