He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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