their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
