the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You are the jesus of drinking
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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